When the world wobbles and uncertainty seems ever present, it is time
to listen for our soul’s voice. Checking in with it can bring a sense of
balance and peace. In this noisy world, what is important can be difficult
to hear. There is no place better to listen than in the heart of our child
self. Our soul’s voice was clear before the world’s agenda became our
marching orders.
What would your seven-year-old self think of the person you have
become? Early hopes and dreams are a powerful influence on later
choices. Can you see how your current life is a response to those early
longings?
Recently, I came across a poignant question. “Have you become the
person your younger self needed?” Such an intriguing way to look at
who we are as adults. Can you see a correlation between who you have
become and who you needed back then? This can be an interesting and
fruitful exploration.
What did younger you want from the adults around her? I wanted
someone to encourage my creativity, cherish and protect me. Most
importantly, I wanted someone to hold me when I was hurting and
validate my experience.
Reading from my book Unfolding, in Paris was important for me. The
above photo captured that moment. I added the image of my younger
self as a tribute to her. She longed to be heard. In those magical Parisian
moments, I was fully present and heard.
Eric Erikson was a famed developmental psychologist. He named the
last adult developmental task, beginning around age sixty-five, “integrity
versus despair.” In plain English, we either make meaning out of the life
we have created or regret our choices. If our life path makes sense to us,
we experience fulfillment. If not, we can experience sorrow and
discontent.
This developmental task calls for a life review. It often happens naturally
at about sixty-five. Life events like retirement or experiencing the loss of
a loved one can also initiates an examination of life choices.
Can we find peace with who we have become?
As poet Mary Oliver asked, “Am I no longer young and still not half-
perfect?” If we are looking for perfection, we will never find it.
Realizing we are perfectly ourselves is how we find contentment.
Maybe looking back will help you appreciate the beauty and complexity
of life. Maybe you can see how your soul’s longing has brought you to
the place you are right now. Hopefully you will remember, we are each a
mystery wrapped in human form. Our mission here in Earth School is to
explore that mystery.
My seven-year-old self would be amazed by me at eighty-one. She never
pictured anything outside her yard, let alone Paris. Her longing to be
heard, is the core of my work. I am sure she would be honored to know
that I turned her pain into a powerful way of helping others and myself.
She would also be pleased to know that I have kept her creative spirit alive.
May you look with kindness on the path you have taken.